I have been going through an intense job search the last few months. I was finally offered a position this past week contingent on passing a background check which didn’t allow for errors without dismissal from the the job. Sometimes I have a hard time with seeing my anxiety present itself. But on weeks like these where I am putting myself out there employment wise to make a major change, it rears it’s ugly head. I’m confident that most people have heard of the flight or fight model. But do you know that model is now called “fight, flight, fréeze or fawn model?” I tend to fall in the freeze category since I was little. An example of this was it took me three days to open my job offer email because I was afraid that the bottom was going to fall out because good/great things like this don’t happen to me.
I realized this week, how much change scares me. Don’t get me wrong! I am so very excited to be starting this position. It is like a dream job. I just have issues with change due to trauma suffered in childhood. I stayed safe most of the time in an environment by learning what to do by watching and emulating the behaviors of others. When starting at a new job where I know no one, that is harder to do. Even more difficult, my team is working from home for now and using zoom to communicate throughout the workday. My anxiety level keeps going up and up. But after 25 years + of mental health work experience I need to just remind myself I am good at what I do and why I was hired.
Does change make you anxious? How do you handle it? Do you rely solely on anxiety meds to relieve your anxiety or do you use other techniques like mindfulness as well? I’d love to hear what helps. Wendy🎄